5 thoughts on “consequences

  1. What is the consequence of ‘being myself’?
    The consequence of ‘being me’ is that I ask myself who I am. Who I am is not clear at all. Yes, of course: I am my body, I am my thoughts, I am my feelings. But I am observing all this what I am and so: I am the observer and somehow separated from that what I am observing. So the consequence is that I am not just that what I thought, felt and what I’m aware of. This is the consequence coming out of my thoughts, ok, so I’m expressing this now.
    So still the question is open: Who am I really? I see that I am filled with all kind of identifications: Memories, traumatic impacts, peaks of happiness and then all those concepts gathered all over the years. Yes, I live out of this and responding and reacting out of this to what comes to me in daily life. And consequently when I express myself, this also is just conditioned from my collection of properties. So that’s me? I can see that people are living this. It seems that they are all longing for more and trying to get more, but they are limited to that what they feel as themselves and can’t go beyond this.
    I don’t want to gather more properties and the consequence is that I want to know what I’m *really*. ‘Being myself’ as much as I’m aware of is not enough! And I don’t want to enhance or boost this by means people are using. This is part of the consumer behaviour of this society and serves only the limited personality. So what?

  2. Hi BeiYin, thank you for your reflection – nice to hear from someone from Ibiza, we probably know some of the same people – I used to live in Mallorca for a while, but it was a long time ago.

    I am grateful that you took up exactly this subject in relation with this posting of mine, since I wrote it after having meditated on this ancient question myself – the “who am I” question. I do very much agree with most of your thoughts, yet I draw somewhat other conclusions.

    First of all I think that finding out who we “really” are is a lost cause. Maybe we can feel it, catch a glimpse of it, but knowing? First of all, knowing who we really are would mean to understand the whole, infinite existence, which we are a part of… Well, maybe we can somehow feel that truth, but, I think, always “only” in our unique way, which is true, but “only” one truth. Secondly: even IF we can find that truth it will change in the next moment, since we, as all of this existence, are constantly changing.

    I think it is important to ponder the “who am I”-question, to meditate on it, to dare to ask it, but always knowing, that even IF we catch a glimpse of our “real selves”, the next minute we will be someone else, and so will all of existence. We are constantly transforming ourselves and our surroundings, just like our surroundings (inside or outside or in another dimension or…) transform us.

    I sometimes, like many others, think that there is an inner core of us, of existence, that always stays the same. But this is not all that we really are in the here and now.

    I think that I often got stuck in my life from trying too hard to find out who I was, who I am, instead of just being who I am in every moment, and then I mean being all of me, soul, mind and body, since that actually is my whole being in the here and now. I realized I should be proud of my complete being, and express me, no matter how “far” in my development that I am. I often thought I have to wait until I am “more me” before I can really express myself, share myself and thus, really be here. But I changed my mind on that.

    I feel that so much suffering comes from trying to hold on to things, or believing to have found “the truth” about existence or ourselves. For me it feels better to just surrender and be what I am right now as fully as I can, and then letting it go, as much as I can under my current state of mind. Being in transformation and giving up knowing any truth, still, expressing myself and my very unique (interpretation of) truth in every moment. I feel that this is taking the consequence of being:

    to BE and express what one is in every moment, because it is all we are and in a way it is also all we’ll ever be, although in a “new” way with every breath.

    I believe that we are here to be, to live, in this dimension, right here, in the now. To breath, love, experience and being experienced.

    I think the trick of how to be is expressed in the idea of the holy trinity: the MotherFather, the SonDaughter and the Holy Ghost =

    being the observer
    expressing all of your being in all dimensions
    being the sum of these two things co-existing with existence
    being all of this in love

    Therefor, without giving up on the question of who I am, I drew this conclusion above. I decided to be, in every moment, to take the consequences of who I am in every moment:
    I chose to BE and express myself with ALL that I am, including the “errors” –

    right here, right now.

  3. i think i am

    for myself a bunch of possibilities created by former experiences, conscious or not, and it is in constant development.

    for others what i choose out of this, consciously or not, and it is in constant development.

    happy about to be in a constant development

    thank you susan for your wonderful blog


  4. About the question: “Who am I?” the following post I just have made might make something more clear. Please make a comment there to continue with the open part of the question.

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